Sunday, March 29, 2009

How to deal with the rotten kid your kid hangs out with?

OK, I have been MIA for a while because of work projects that required crazy hours and lots of OT. I am in between those and the next set, so here I am--and I am ranting!

For D's 13th birthday, I upgraded her secondhand cell phone to a nicer one-the Alias. She was so thrilled to get it because it was a lot smaller than the eNvy (aka "The Brick") and it fit in her pocket easier. It also had neater features. I say "had" because the same little bee itch (AC) that stole her jeans earlier this year apparently stole the phone when they were all at the skate park.

Of course, the little monster swears she doesn't have it, although it was being answered/hung up when we called to see if it was in the house. When D called AC to ask about it, the girl got very defensive and then hung up. Later, she claimed she never saw the phone to begin with. Then she went into "you people are crazy" rant and told us to leave her alone. But she keeps messaging D on her MySpace page and calling the house and hanging up.

Yesterday, at Extreme Thing, AC saw D and ran off. Other kids mentioned that she was bragging about the phone to them.

The phone service is suspended on that number, but the girl has a brand new phone with a new microSD card and all D's contacts and pictures. God only knows what the heck she will do with them. The last time she got her hands on that kind of information (from another kid), she called and texted the contacts with all sorts of nasty trashy messages. The pictures ended up on MySpace.

The contacts can be gotten back because we get the backup service from our provider and I had just synced the numbers earlier that day. But that is not the point... This girl is allowed to run wild because her parents just don't give a sh!t.

I am sorry her parents are alcohols and drug addicts and her brother deals drugs. However, it is NOT my responsibility to provide her with clothing, food or anything else. The girl thinks that, if she worms her way into our house, she is entitled to pick up any of D's clothes she likes, take food out of the fridge and steal whatever else she likes. Of course, D is afraid to say anything because of the girl's family.

Unfortunately, there are way too many kids like that around here. Parents drink or do drugs, work weird hours and leave the kids alone most of the time, forget to buy food for the house, etc. Yeah, I feel sorry for them, but I also am a parent and I work.

The difference is that I pay the bills first, then buy food for the house. Only then do we entertain extras like a trip to the mall or buying a bunch of silly stuff. D doesn't like to see drinking so much as a beer around her because of those other parents, so I don't keep alcohol in the house at all. I think my biggest vice is sneaking in a box of Cella chocolate-covered cherries once in a while.

The biggest problem is that I cannot keep D from having contact with those kids. They go to her school, they hang out at the same places... I tell her that she needs to stay aloof because there is going to come a day when something horrific is going to happen with those kids and I do not want her to get dragged into it. I know that when they do finally bust AC's family, anyone in the house will go to jail with them. I just do NOT want my kid to be within a country mile of their place when it happens.

Right now, AC is harboring a runaway at her house and her parents are letting the girl stay there. D found out and saw the girl's sister and told her. I know some of you will say that's snitching, but AC's house is no place for her, let alone someone else's kid. I tried to get the police to investigate that family before, but they say they have too many other things to deal with. Too busy now, but when some tragedy strikes, they will be all contrite and swear they did their best.

It is impossible short of moving (and that may be a possibility) to keep the bad kids away from your own kids, but I am darned sure going to do everything in my power to keep that contact to a minimum outside of school (where they WILL have to interact since some are in the same classes).

If I thought I could get away with it (and I know I can't), I would spank the little brat myself and then personally drive her over to Child Haven since Juvie is always full up.

Now D tells me Little Miss AC is trying to be friends again. Who knows what she has up her sleeve now?

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