Sunday, August 01, 2004

Farting Swimsuits and Misleading Movies

OK, did the swim party thing with Danielle. It was actually pretty fun for both of us. Danielle got to play with her friends (including the "boyfriend"). We splashed around in the pool and I convinced her to try to swim properly. Right now, she wears a life vest when she swims and it's hard for her to do it right.

Yesterday, we went to the pool again. That is when I decided to never wear the Delta Burke swimsuit ever again! It's OK for lounging around on a chaise, but not for the water. With the rip-stop nylon shorts holding air, the danged suit kept bubbling up constantly, so I spent way too much time holding the thing down. The topper was when I went into the shallow end and the legs caught the air. As I went farther in, the legs filled out. Then there was a rush as water replaced air and my swimsuit farted loudly, complete with large bubbles coming out from the legs! George Carlin could have gotten five minutes out of the whole scene. And of course Danielle yelled out to all her friends, "Look everybody! My momma's swimmy-suit is farting!" I went underwater immediately and swam far away from the scene, air filling the legs once again, making it look like a blimp is floating on my ass.

Other than that, we had a good day. Spent almost three hours at the pool, went to Burger King and then to the movie.

Now, I need to really give a swift kick in the pants to the idiot who decided to market "Two Brothers" as a kiddy movie! After a few cute tiger family scenes (including one bit with tigers mating), it went full-force into seriously grown-up issues. Mommy tiger grabbing one but not the other cub, daddy tiger killed protecting the other, cubs tied up and dragged around, organized hunting parties where they flush out the tigers in advance, one cub sold to a mean circus owner (where another tiger was killed to make room for it) and the other raised to be a killer... Yeah, that's entertainment! I spent half the freakin' movie trying to calm Danielle down and drying her tears. At the end, there was a blurb about the plight of the tiger, but it didn't explain why the tigers were endangered which I gather was the REAL purpose of the movie.

Today we are vegging. Both of us playing on the Net, me doing laundry and she trashing the house. Dinner is in the oven-London broil with carrots and potatoes. I have some sewing to do tonight, mending some of Danielle's clothes and finishing a tank top I am making for her. I need to cut some other clothes out, but maybe next Saturday when I have Respite night and five Danielle-free hours. On the 14th, she has a birthday party to go to and I am hoping the girl's mom invites D to spend the night.

No comments: